Citizenship

I thought about writing a bigger, broader post reflecting on 2018 and what lies ahead for 2019, but a) I don't quite have the mental energy for it, b) there's been so much to think about that if I do write it down, it needs to be a series of separate blogs and c) I've been thinking about citizenship a lot recently, and wanted to record my thoughts.

This blog started life in the months leading up to our big move, which now seems a lifetime ago. I catch myself now and then driving around this beautiful state, gently amazed at the fact that we get to live here and that we've forged (are forging) a life for ourselves in a different country. Leeds often feels like a different world, and I'm not sure if that makes me feel happy, sad or nostalgic, or all of the above. However, this blog is titled "The Life of an Alien" with all the connotations of the word intended. 2019 will mark the end of our 3rd year here, and I will be eligible to apply for US citizenship.

There is not a moment's hesitation in my mind that I want to get my US citizenship, especially as it's legal for me to hold dual nationality with the UK. The benefits are manifold - I would get to vote (finally a chance to do something about the mess I see here!), I wouldn't be as worried about the anti-immigration rhetoric that comes out of the current administration, I get to hold the same passports as my children, and I never have to worry about visas expiring or being canceled. My biggest regret writing this list is that we never had the money to do this for my wife in the UK. Whilst it's more of a moot point now as we're living in her home country, I kinda wish that we had done it for her. 

The question is therefore not if, but when. April 8th marks the anniversary of us arriving, but there's an outside chance that I may be able to apply in January, which suddenly makes the idea of becoming an American real. I had to fight the urge just then to not put the word American in quotation marks, as I would be an American citizen with all the same rights and responsibilities that are afforded to my friends and family here. My urge to put them there represents the core of this post - if I have an American passport, pay taxes to the American government and work in an American school, at what point do I become American?

I recite the Pledge of Allegiance at school each day and every time I say the opening line (“I pledge allegiance to the flag…), I feel like I’m cheating as it doesn’t feel like my flag yet. I wonder if having citizenship will make me feel more truthful instantly, or if it will be a more gradual thing. The daily Pledge is one of those things that makes me feel most like an alien; partly it’s because I find it a strange thing that everyone is expected to do, regardless of whether you believe/understand the words, and partly because it’s strange to pledge allegiance to another country’s flag, even if it’s a country that I have chosen to live in.

I have a feeling that getting my American citizenship will feel like getting married. In some respects, nothing will change. I will have a blue and purple passport (although soon to be two blue passports if Brexiteers have their way), but I will still go to work, pay taxes, play with my kids and live my life as I have done for the last almost-three years. In some respects, lots will change. It will be a symbolic gesture to the longevity of our move (those hoping to see us return to the UK any time soon may choose to read another blog!) as well as a confirmation of the roots and ties that I/we are putting down over here. It’s that latter sentiment that fills me with excitement, and whilst I think I will always sound different and have a different set of cultural references and vocabulary, I think knowing that I belong here (and have the paperwork to prove it!) will make me feel less of an alien and make America feel more like home.